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The Evolution of Arvind Kejriwal

Jayasankar Thayyil by Jayasankar Thayyil
29 May 2016
in Satire
Arvind Kejriwal
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One day when whole India was celebrating the arrival of their beloved god to Vasudeva and Devaki, a boy was born to an engineer in a small town in Hisar, Haryana. They named him Arvind. The young couple was delighted as a boy was born. This was evident as they were belonging to a State where girls are considered as a burden and hated. From childhood, Arvind was a curious child. He always had doubts about the things happening around him and would always pop up “what” and “why” to anything that caught up in his little mind.

One day while watching television, he saw a Johnson & Johnson ad capturing moments between a mother and baby. Just then a question aroused in his mind and he bluntly asked his father “Papa, how are babies born?” His mother till now cherishing her time in front of the television quickly remembered about her sabzi and rushed to the kitchen and his father suddenly got a call from nowhere.

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Arvind was sad but he was persistent. So he stopped taking food from that day as he badly wanted an answer. His parents were anxious, as it is really hard for any parent to see their 5 year old starving. And his parents finally subdued to Arvind’s insistent stand and told him that baby is put into mother’s womb by god. And that’s why we always offer prayers to thank god for gifting us a wonderful child like you. Arvind was delighted and from that day onwards he used this weapon of fasting to any answers he doesn’t know.

Arvind’s curiosity never died and his parents certainly had a tough time bringing him up. One day he asked his father “why do we live in this world papa?” His father was taken aback, he was baffled and at the same time happy for his son’s sheer brilliance. And after spending hours of critical thinking, he came up with the best answer he could give. He called Arvind and told him.

“Beta, we live in this world for MONEY.”

(Oh come on. He is a typical middle class father and he could not have come up with a better answer)

Arvind was happy as now he had an aim to live upon. And again asked his father “papa, what is the first step we need to earn money?”

His father puffed his heart up, held his head high and replied proudly

“Beta, become an engineer from IIT”

From that day onwards an IIT bug stung Arvind. And his dream finally came true in 1985.

He was having a gala time at IIT, as he was heading in right direction to fulfill his dream. But his dream was shattered when “Bofors scandal” broke during that time under Rajiv Gandhi’s regime. He came to know that babus (bureaucrats) functioning under Rajiv Gandhi earned crores of rupees from this scam. He was heartbroken as this was much larger sum that the engineer graduates from IIT would have earned.

And on that day, he took a vow, that he would not stop until he become a Babu (bureaucrat). And in 1995, owing to his hard work and brilliance, he cracked the civil service exam in the first attempt. Arvind finally felt contented in his life and he planned to settle down. He married his batch mate from IRS. Arvind was all set to earn money now.

But a turnaround of events happened after he summoned the office. He came to realize that the politicians earn 10 times more than babus in the government service.

Arvind was devastated, as becoming politician was not his cup of tea as he always was an introvert and he didn’t had any skill to mobilize people to support him.

On that day, he took a major decision. He decided that

“ If I can’t earn money then why should I allow politicians to earn money?”

He quit his service and spearheaded the bastion for fighting corruption to stop the netas from earning money.

And that’s the Arvind Kejriwal we all know, always geared up against corruption…………….”

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