लालयेत्पञ्च्वर्षाणि दशवर्षाणि ताडयेत्
प्राप्ते तु षोडशे वर्षे पुत्रं मित्रवदाचरेत्
Here’s what this shloka means:
Up to the age of 5 (Panch – Varshaani)
Love your child a lot (Laalayet)
Up to the age of 10, (Dash – Varshaani)
Be strict with him/her (TaaDyet)
But when the child reaches the age of 16 (Shodashe)
Treat him/her as a friend. (Putr Mitra Vadaacharet)
Essentially, from 6 to 16 years of age, children are to be treated strictly. These are the most fragile years for any child, and it is during this period that their foundations will be laid. Their character and personality will be decided during these 10 years. If parents do not control their children in these 10 years, they will play a direct role in their offspring’s ruination.
A 30-year-old woman in Noida learnt this the hard way. She ended up dead on Sunday. Who killed the woman? Her 14-year-old daughter.
Why?
According to the reports, the now-dead mother asked her daughter to clean the dishes. The daughter refused to do the household chores. This led to the mother scolding her. The scolding was followed by the teenage girl battering her mother’s head with 22 blows of a frying pan.
The incident, which took place in Noida’s sector 77, has brought to light the dangerous trend which is today finding a significant audience in Indian society. The girl claims to be “depressed” and “anxious”. This is convenient. Children getting merely scolded by parents these days, thanks to social media, self-diagnose themselves as patients of acute clinical depression and anxiety.
According to police, the girl initially said that she found her mother in a pool of blood when she came back home from a walk. But detailed investigation and thorough scanning of CCTV cameras at the apartment complex revealed the truth. Upon further interrogation, the girl confessed to the crime and said that she had beaten her mother to death.
Police said that the woman was around 30 years old and lived with her daughter after she had separated from her husband. She worked in the supply department of a firm in Greater Noida. The police registered a case of murder against the girl under Section 304 (culpable homicide not amounting to murder) of the Indian Penal Code (IPC). Currently, the girl has been sent to a juvenile correctional centre.
How is Scolding Children Sending Kids into Depression?
The age of social media has marked the entry of nonsensical Western ideas into India. Children have access to social media, and so do parents. On social media, saying that parents need to be strict with teenagers and young adults is today considered wrong and politically incorrect. It is not in line with ‘liberal’ ideals, so to speak.
The consequence? Parents have no authority over their children and even get killed.
If parents do not scold their children and treat them firmly – preparing them for the world, who will?
And yet, parents fulfilling their basic responsibility of correcting children, teaching them the importance of responsibilities and duties has suddenly been turned into a manifestation of toxic parenting culture.
Read more: The failure of pseudo-modern Hindu Parents is creating a generation of deracinated dumb kids
The situation is even direr for a single parent. Usually, one parent plays the strict role, while the other acts like the confidante of the child. Single parents have to play all roles themselves – which takes a toll on them, and they too might falter every now and then.
The future does not look very promising. Children are increasingly disgusted by their own parents. Don’t believe me? Open the Twitter account of any teenager and/or millennial. Chances are, he/she will be abusing their parents while having pronouns listed on their bio.
It is difficult to be a parent in today’s world. The 30-year-old woman of Noida paid for playing the role of a mother with her life.