Wake up Britishers, this is not 1943!

BBC India food inflation: “If these folks can send a mission to Moon, why should we still give them aid?”

“The impact of this – particularly on the world’s poor – could be devastating with food insecurity deteriorating in 18 “hunger hotspots” identified by the FAO and UN’s World Food Programme.”

Brother, it has been some seven decades since some ungrateful souls left our nation for good. Yet, after all these years, they still have the gall to sermonize us on how to handle our affairs.

Today, it’s time to tell these Britishers, “This is 2023, you’re no more our masters, period!”

Old Habits Die Hard!

“India have landed on the Moon. £2.3 billion in UK aid went to India between 2016 and 2021. We don’t live in a serious country.”

‘Taxpayers are sending money to India, they are!’

The words oozed sarcasm, painting a picture of the UK doling out funds to a not-so-deserving India. But the real crescendo of derision arrived when the venerable BBC decided to brandish India as the culprit behind global hunger.

Brace yourselves, for their headline proclaimed, “Why India’s soaring inflation is a global problem?” As if that weren’t enough, the article sported a juicy subtitle, “Is India exporting food inflation to the world?” The line between news and satire was blurrier than ever.

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Now, let’s dissect this uproar. The article, far from a balanced inquiry, painted India as a malevolent food inflation exporter. The International Food Policy Research Institute (IFPRI) played the doomsayer, suggesting defensive stance of India on its domestic prices could trigger worldwide catastrophe. The culprits? Rice, sugar, and onions – a culinary trio with the power to sway economies.

India’s rise in the global rice market over the last decade is astonishing, claiming a whopping 40% share. Not to be outdone, it takes a silver medal as the second-largest exporter of sugar and onions. Enter the United Nations’ Food and Agriculture Organization (FAO), raising the alarm with a 2.8% leap in its Rice Price Index – a level untouched since 2011. The instigator? Price hikes in a rice variety India decided to embargo. A prudent move for domestic balance, but apparently a Pandora’s box for global food costs.

“Since the ban was announced late last month, Thai rice prices have increased 20%,” sneers Joseph W Glauber, a senior researcher at IFPRI, relishing the validation of his grim prophecy. The FAO chimes in, pinpointing India’s ban as the “upward pressure” on rice prices worldwide. Suddenly, rice transforms from a humble grain to a global economy disruptor, and India takes center stage as the super evil antagonist. Does UK really consider us that dumb?

Amidst this blame volley, one question remains unasked: Why the rush to blame India alone? Is this a modern-day witch hunt, where headlines are the torches that burn rationality? Expecting rational answers from the Englishmen is like expecting Virat Kohli to win the FIFA World Cup for us!

Pot Calling the Kettle Black!

Ever noticed how some folks love dishing out advice while their own backyard’s a mess? Well, that’s the story of UK, who can’t even keep its basics in check, yet feels entitled to lecture others.

Here’s the kicker: the British flights recently hit a snag because of a tech glitch. Flights stopped dead in their tracks, schedules went haywire – all thanks to a technical hiccup. Funny thing is, this is no vintage tale from aviation’s wild beginnings. This is a recent reality from a place that’s supposed to have everything sorted.

But that’s not all. Brace yourself for the real punchline. This nation’s closing down its last ammonia plant. You might think they’re going green, but nope. They’re banking on nitrogen fertilizer from abroad. Yep, a country that used to lead the industrial gang is now counting on imports to feed its fields.

And guess what they’ve been up to? Giving India lectures on fiscal policies! Imagine that – a country with poverty, homelessness, a healthcare system barely holding up, acting like an economics guru. It’s like a bicycle teaching a race car how to zoom.

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Hold on, there’s more. This ‘advice central’ is struggling with its own laundry list of problems. From sky-high inflation to a sluggish economy, they’re practically writing a manual on what not to do. And yet, they’ve got no qualms about schooling the world’s fastest-growing economy, a beast with a GDP bigger than $3.7 trillion.

But here’s where the plot thickens. This advice-spouting nation has a history, and it’s not a bedtime story. They’ve built their wealth on looted riches, a cool $45 trillion worth, taken from Bharat’s soil. Now, they’re trying to school us on poverty and foreign aid. It’s like a bandit advising a police officer on law enforcement.

In the grand theater of global politics, it’s a comedy of irony. The spotlight’s on, the actors are ready, but perhaps a little self-check would make the show smoother. See, it’s not about shaming anyone. It’s about realizing that the world’s like a web – mess with one thread, the whole thing vibrates.

No wonder why our beloved Foreign Minister S Jaishankar rightly said, “Europe has to grow out of the mindset that Europe’s problems are the world’s problems, but the world’s problems are not Europe’s problems.”

Dear UK, fix your backyard first. This is 2023, not 1943, that you can diss India and get away with it! The world is watching, and so are the Indians!

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