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Office of the Prime Minister of India finally gets a worthy contender!

Manoranjan Chaudhary by Manoranjan Chaudhary
16 December 2015
in Satire, TFIUvaach
Office of the Prime Minister of India finally gets a worthy contender!
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A team of eminent scholars was called in London to take a final call on the expulsion of word ‘hope’ from oxford dictionary. This word had become redundant for so many months now and carrying it just for the sake of an academic purpose was useless.

In some different part of the world, another very important meeting was held where chiefs of all nations brainstormed for taking measures to increase the happiness quotient of the world which was threatening to become negative. Most of the psychologists believed that current level of 0.19 out of 100 is so alarming that if nothing is done in next few days, the whole world will sink in depression.

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The lifelessness was so widespread at all hierarchical levels of organic species that even plants have rejected photosynthesis. All 300MM of species including 7 billion population of the human race was prepared for slow and peaceful death. Some of the distinguished astrologers had predicted that prevention of the apocalypse can only be possible from where it all started.

In May 2014, precisely on 16th May 2014, a Psychopath (with correct spelling) won a massive verdict by hypnotizing 1.2 billion human populations with his black magic and became Prime Minister of India. In holy books of liberals, it has mentioned that this man had acquired all his black magic by slaughtering more than 10,000 peace-loving people by his own hands. As expected, as soon as assuming power all of his followers started exploiting the greatest peace-loving community in the world. The intolerance and animosity were in such a rise that one of the safest men of the land thought of moving out from here. But where to go? This great satan had travelled the length and breadth of an entire world and intimidated all world leaders to work for him.

As for every ‘Kans’ there is a ‘Krishna’ and for every ‘Ravan’ there is a ‘Ram’. Will there be anyone for this Satan. Someone has to be there, someone within ourselves; someone from his very own land, Nature can’t leave him like this.

And suddenly there was an oracle from the sky, “I am ready to become the Prime Minister of India. All parties should plan and elect me as their leader. It will not only help India to progress but will send the positive signal across the world” The great saint is ready to sacrifice his ordinary life to become the Prime Minister of India for showcasing to world the true path. Will his positivity strong enough to rescue the entire planet from the shadow of negativity? Let us look at the man’s credentials and assure yourself:

1.The eternal man who never died: He was alive when Shah Jahan built Taj Mahal for the remembrance of his love. He lived all through years to ratify the fact Taj Mahal is a mausoleum which should come under the ambit of Sunni central waqf board.

2.The diplomat who can end Indo-Pak conflict within seconds: Kashmir is not a part of India, he declared long back in 2010. Such a simple solution. Magical, isn’t it? How much wonders he will do if he becomes the Prime Minister of India.

3.The beloved of all: Such a humble man he is. Even Taliban and Dawood are fond of him and they respectfully offer him a part yearly which he generously donates for the Birthday bash of his mate. After he becomes Prime Minister of India, why to scare of Dawood ?

4.The ombudsman of social network: As the miscreants at social sites rising day by day, he voluntarily keeps a check on all social happenings. A number of people have been caught, prosecuted and sent to jail all by him. He is an institution of judiciary.

The whole world is on celebration mode since the man himself has made the announcement. But where is the man? Could no one find him? Has he gone for meditation to gain the extra power but no, it’s contradictory, there is no power left in this world which the man doesn’t possess. Has he gone in heaven to meet his colleagues and discuss road map of recovering the world? Oh wait, I can’t believe my eyes, the man is in front of me. He is addressing a huge gathering. The audience is listening to him mesmerizingly. He is singing a song:

तन्हाई में ना घबराइयो
मिलने एक लम्हे तू अइयो
उस लम्हे में ठहर सा जइयो

There is a pin drop silence in the audience. I have never seen buffalos being so quiet. That is the aura of our man. He kept on singing:

यहीं हूँ मैं
यहीं हूँ मैं
कहीं ना गया तुझे छोड़ के मैं !!

P.S : Dear judges of India,

This article has nothing to do with Azam Khan and his spout of being the fittest person to become the Prime Minister of India and any defamation suit against the author by Azam Khan should not be entertained.

Tags: Azam KhanBuffaloMulayam Singh YadavPrime Minister of IndiaSamajwadi PartyUttar Pradesh
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