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1.2 Billion Angry Men – Part3

Atul Kumar Mishra
by Atul Kumar Mishra
20 July 2013
in Analysis
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Please read Part 1 and Part 2 before reading Part 3 

Manoj Bembalkar – Where are you from Mr. Shivhare?

 

Deepak Shivhare – I am from Guna, ever  heard of it?

 

Manoj Bembalkar – Poona?

 

Deepak Shivhare – No No, Guna, Guna in Madhya Pradesh. It’s a small town between Gwalior and Indore?

 

Manoj Bembalkar – Oh I have been to both Gwalior and Indore. Madhya Pradesh is quite a sleepy state

 

Deepak Shivhare – Yeah! It tries hard to stay away from bad news

 

Karan Wadhwa – Want a drag brother?

 

Aftab Anwar – What?

 

Karan Wadhwa – Want a drag?

 

Aftab Anwar – Huh! I’d rather light my own

 

Karan Wadhwa – Weird but your call!

 

Parijat Ghosh – There are people of all kinds and varieties sir, you shouldn’t take them seriously

 

Sardar Sukhpal Singh – Agreed, I am a High Blood Pressure patient. My Punjabi life style has to be blamed for it

 

Parijat Ghosh – Haha moments back you were praising Sikhs and Punjabis. Why this sudden change of heart?

 

Sardar Sukhpal Singh – Nothing is perfect in this world my son. We Punjabis are loud. We are extravagant. We are spendthrifts. We are the biggest attention seekers in this world. We love to flaunt. Come to a Punjabi wedding and you’d see the grand wastage of food, pointless exhibition of gold jewellery and expensive scotches in the bar. It’s all a huge waste of money and resources.

 

 

Parijat Ghosh – But how does this connect to your High blood pressure?

 

Sardar Sukhpal Singh– Arre, the amount of ghee and makkhhan we Punjabis use in our food is crazy and we can’t control our food cravings. We eat and we bloat and then in old age our bowels don’t move. We get high blood pressure, chronic constipation so harsh that sometimes you have to put fingers in your rectum to…

 

 

Parijat Ghosh – Okay Okay I got it….

 

Deepak Shivhare – Are we all done? If yes, let’s get back to work

 

Sandeep Nair – Many things amuse me, self-proclaimed leaders are one of them

 

Deepak Shivhare – Was that for me? Was that for me?

 

Sandeep Nair – Get back to work guys

 

Deepak Shivhare – No wait, you think I am getting some extra pay for leading the proceedings. Do you think I am getting some benefit out of it?

 

Kaypey Chawngthu – Leave it Mr. Shivhare, let’s get back to work

 

Deepak Shivhare – No I am not doing it. Mr. Nair wants to lead. I am out of it.

 

Sandeep Nair – Relax, Relax I was just joking, No need to get so worked up. And if you wish to hear sorry then sorry, I take my words back.

 

Suhail Raza – That’s awesome. Let’s continue then.

 

Deepak Shivhare – That is better. So where were we?

 

Mukesh Jha – Corruption

 

Suhail Raza – So I say government is totally responsible for the corruption and there was no way we could have stopped them

 

Parijat Ghosh – But Raza sahib tell me, who made the government so big, so carefree and so mighty?

 

Suhail Raza – I didn’t get that

 

Parijat Ghosh – I’ll tell you. India got independent in 1947 and this is 2013. Sixty six long years have passed but how much have we learnt. The older generation associates the ruling party with the independence struggle, considers the ruling family as a family of martyrs and passes the same advice to the next generation. And hence India which is a democracy has been reduced to a monarchy with voting as the only difference.

 

Mukesh Jha – I never vote for them. I know they are a handful of traitors.

 

Suhail Raza – But Mr. Ghosh tell me one thing. You can’t really change perceptions right. If people want to vote for them they will vote for them. You can’t really stop them.

 

Prasanna Venkatesh – True. There are loyal supporters everywhere. Be it a football club, a film star, a cricketer everywhere.

 

Kaypey Chawngthu – What do we do to change it?

 

Manoj Bembalkar – Start voting like logical individuals. Till the time we keep voting like Dalits and Agdaas, Hindus and Muslims, North Indians and South Indians, we can’t really prosper. But I still hold the Government guilty.

 

Aftab Anwar – Logic is fine but we have to make sure communal forces don’t get to rule us

 

Rajeev Pandey – Okay this man has started again. I can’t keep shut now. What communal forces are you talking about?

 

Aftab Anwar – The mosque demolishing temple raising squad

 

Rajeev Pandey – You lost one mosque and you cry like an infant. Your forefathers, the looters and plunderers they razed thousands of our temples. What do you have to say about them?

 

Aftab Anwar – That’s an old and forgotten chapter. Those were extreme times.

 

Rajeev Pandey – Very well. Now that we are living in a liberal era, can we get our temples back? All of them?

 

Aftab Anwar – What will you do with your temples, stop arguing like a fool

 

Rajeev Pandey – Then why do you have to bring your mosque in the topic.

 

Aftab Anwar – Okay what about Gujarat?

 

Rajeev Pandey – Yeah what about Gujarat?

 

Aftab Anwar –Thousands of Muslims were slaughtered in Gujarat. Do you think we are going to forgive you just like that?

 

Rajeev Pandey – You guys just have one massacre to talk about. What led to the Gujarat riots, the Godhra incident. Few Muslims committed a crime and some had to suffer. Simple.

 

Parijat Ghosh – Leave them guys. So if there are loyal supporters, we can’t change perceptions and people who want to vote for them will vote for them so tell me how are ’they’ responsible and not ‘us’?

 

Prasanna Venkatesh – Hey let’s do a voting again to see where do we stand now?

 

Deepak Shivhare – Let’s do it. I’ll pass a chit this time, Let’s do a secret voting. All of you can write either guilty or not guilty. Is that fine?

 

Mukesh Jha – Yes pass the chits please

 

(After the voting is done and submitted)

 

Deepak Shivhare – Okay Folks, I’ll open the chits one by one and announce the decisions

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Not Guilty”

 

Sandeep Nair – That’s the Bengali Babu for you

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Not Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

“Guilty”

 

Rajeev Pandey – Miyan jee did what he wanted to do

 

Aftab Anwar – ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?

 

Rajeev Pandey  – You are not the only Miyaan jee here

 

Aftab Anwar – But you meant me, right?

 

Rajeev Pandey – Yes I was referring to you. How do you know? Did your guilty conscience just whispered in your ears?

 

Aftab Anwar – I didn’t change my vote

 

Mukesh Jha – Then Who did? These prejudiced brainless idiots shouldn’t be called for such important tasks. These can never go for an impartial voting

 

(To be continued)

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दुर्गा सहस्रनाम

Atul Kumar Mishra

Atul Kumar Mishra

Lovable Narcissist | Whiskey Lover | Dharma Warrior | Founder, The Frustrated Indian | CEO, tfipost.com

Comments 3

  1. Avatar Vipul says:
    7 years ago

    Hope to read more of it. Good work brother!! Very nice!!!

    Reply
  2. Avatar Ishank says:
    7 years ago

    Appreciate this read….. Is it’s 4 part coming out…. it’s been 4 months now from last edition… I understand you might be busy but it’s again frustrating leaving a conversation/story unended…!!

    Reply
  3. Avatar Nishant Gupta says:
    7 years ago

    hahaha.. eagerly waiting for next part.. good job bro :)

    Reply

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