37 Erma Bombeck Quotes: Wit and Wisdom from Everyday Life

Erma Bombeck quotes

Immerse yourself in the delightful world of Erma Bombeck, the beloved American humorist. Erma Bombeck quotes capture the humor and wisdom found in the ordinary, reminding us to cherish life’s simplest moments with a smile.

29 Erma Bombeck quotes and captions

  1. “If the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be.” is my theory regarding housework. Nobody bothers. Why ought you to?”
  2. “The only reason I would begin jogging is to hear heavy breathing once more.”
  3. “Guilt: the gift that continues to give.”
  4. “If done correctly, housework can kill you.”
  5. “I don’t overeat. I’m a voyager of food.” – Erma Bombeck quotes
  6. “When your mom asks, ‘Do you need a suggestion?’ it is a simple custom. Whether you answer yes or no is irrelevant. It will be yours anyway.”
  7. “It is genetic madness; It comes from your kids.”
  8. “When humor goes, civilization goes.”
  9. “Never lend your car to someone you’ve given birth to.”
  10. “There’s nothing more troubled in this world than to conscious Christmas morning and not be a youngster.”

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Erma Bombeck’s words 

  1. “A man ought to be declared legally dead if he watches three football games in a row.”
  2. “The only reason I would begin jogging is to hear heavy breathing once more.”
  3. “I come from a family where sauce is viewed as a drink.”
  4. “Working mother” is a redundant term. – Erma Bombeck quotes
  5. “Is he still wrong if a man speaks in the middle of the forest and no woman is nearby to hear him?”
  6. “The only reason I would begin jogging is to hear heavy breathing once more.”
  7. “Call 911 when a child is locked in the bathroom with the water running and says he is doing nothing while the dog is barking.”
  8. “Quickly take advantage of the opportunity. Think back on all the women on “Titanic” who waved at the dessert cart to leave.”
  9. Ironing is my second favorite household chore. The first was falling unconscious after hitting my head on the top bunk bed.

Erma Bombeck quotes and captions

  1. “Take advantage of the opportunity. Think back on the Titanic’s women who waved at the dessert cart.
  2. “If the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be.” is my theory regarding housework. Nobody else is bothered. Why ought you to?” – Erma Bombeck quotes
  3. “When your mom asks, ‘Do you need a suggestion?’ it is a simple custom. Whether you answer yes or no is irrelevant. It will be yours anyway.”
  4. Never visit a physician whose office plants have perished.
  5. “When they least deserve it, a child needs your love the most.”
  6. “A man ought to be declared legally dead if he watches three football games in a row.”
  7. “It is genetic to be insane. You can get it from your children.”
  8. “The only reason I would begin jogging is to hear heavy breathing once more.” – Erma Bombeck quotes
  9. “I’ve lost a total of 789 pounds over the past two decades. I ought to be attached to a charm bracelet.
  10. “When humor goes, civilization goes.”

Also Read: Savouring Life’s Tangy Lessons: Lemon Quotes and Captions

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