There was a village right in the heart of India. The village was very much like any other village in India. There were farmers, and shopkeepers and potters and cobblers and washer men and fishermen, people of all types and varieties. They belonged to different religions but barring a few scuffles, they lived in a state of relative harmony with each other.
One day, a white ambassador pulled into the main village market. There was a man in a flawless white safari suit inside the car. He had an air of importance about him. As soon as he stepped out of the car, his minions came running with umbrellas and water bottles. The villagers looked at the man with bewildered eyes. The man coughed and introduced himself as the collector of the district. He summoned the village sarpanch and asked him to prepare a two column list, the first column containing the names of the villager and the second containing their religion. It was a herculean task to prepare a comprehensive list, the sarpanch asked for a week’s time and the collector gave him 3 days.
The Sarpanch left no stone unturned in preparing a comprehensive list. He went to every door, asked for the resident’s names and then wrote it down on the sheet. He was done by the end of day three. The collector came again after three days and asked the sarpanch to hand the list over to him and also give him a collective count.
“Dear sir, a total of 34202 people live in this village” sarpanch said.
“Very well, now give me the detailed breakup for the different religions” The collector asked.
“Sir 20600 people are from the dog religion, 10200 from hyena religion, 1127 are from the wolf religion and rest 2275 belong to the Jackal religion”.
“Awesome, you have done a good job” The collector replied with a smile.
“But sir what will you do with these figures?” The confused sarpanch asked.
“I’ll tell you…These dogs will be called Majority from now on. The wolves, Hyenas and Jackals are all minority?” The collector replied coolly.
“Why sir?” The sarpanch was even more confused.
“Simply because most people in this village are dogs” The collector smiled more.
“But sir these hyenas are over 10000, aren’t they second majority” The sarpanch questioned.
“Valid point, but no. That’s what the rules say” The collector took out his rimless spectacles and wiped it with a handkerchief.
“Okay fair enough, now what will these majority and minority do sir?” The sarpanch asked
“Nothing…There is a new rule coming up sarpanch jee. If a religious majority attacks a religious minority, the majority will be booked under that rule” The collector replied.
“Please explain with an example sir” The sarpanch asked.
“Okay, so let’s say tomorrow the dogs attack the hyenas, they’ll be booked under this rule. Clear?” The collector replied.
“No sir. What if the hyenas attack the dogs?” The sarpanch asked.
“The dogs will be prosecuted again, because they are majority” The Collector answered.
“That’s unfair” The sarpanch shouted. He was a dog himself.
“Valid point, but no. That’s what the rules say” The collector smiled.
“And what if the Hyenas attack the wolves, they’ll be booked under this rule, right?” The sarpanch asked.
“No” The collector had an evil grin this time.
“Why? In this case they are the majority.” The sarpanch was beginning to get frustrated.
“No Dear no, Dogs will always be a majority. In a scuffle between minorities, no one will be booked” The sarpanch laughed.
“What an evil plan? Is this a plan to upset the majorities?” The sarpanch shouted.
“I don’t think so, but to appease the minorities? Certainly, yes” The collector patted the sarpanch’s back.
“One last question sir, what is this rule called?” The sarpanch asked.
“Communal Violence Bill”, the collector smiled, shook hands with the sarpanch and then called his driver to set off for the district headquarters. He had to submit the reports for the village as soon as possible.
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